There Isn't Just One Way to Win in the NFL

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If you're like me, you've spent your past four months' days off waking up around 2, flipping on Nick Wright and scouring Twitter and Arrowhead Pride for the latest Chiefs news, opinions on how the Chiefs could turn (sh)it around, and updates on Brodie Croyle's marriage (no way that lasts right?). Well, you might find yourself as perturbed as I am listening to the exhaustive rhetoric that the only way to win in the NFL is to field an elite QB. I do not believe this to be true. Here's why...

There are all kinds of ways to win in the NFL. Why? Because, by definition, you only have to be one point better than your opponent on that given day. Bad quarterbacks win, good quarterbacks lose, bad defenses trounce, good defenses get trounced, yada yada yada. There's no proven formula for success here.

That's the lesson of this Divisional Round weekend.

~The San Francisco 49ers advanced to Championship Weekend behind a Guinness defense, an unblockable force in Justin Smith, a freak of a tight end, some questionable playcalling, and an amazing display of heart from their QB (who nobody, including me, thought could get it done when it mattered).

~The New England Patriots advanced to Championship Weekend by jumping to an early 14 point lead on a team who, according to most people, is quarterbacked by a 4'9 Jewish carpenter, over-celebrating every defensive play made against that hairy man in sandals (given, it was the first time many of these defenders had actually made a play), and by whipping their Gronks out and slinging them around. And their QB is alright.

~The Baltimore Ravens advanced to Championship Weekend by slowing down the league's best RB in the second half (Ray Lewis and Arian Foster's postgame, futbol-style trading of jerseys was the coolest thing that happened this weekend), growing lucky handlebar mustaches (how else do you explain playing TJ Yates in an NFL playoff game?), and taking advantage of two huge breaks (muffed punt and Yates' conundrum numero uno) that they're also gonna need come next week.

~The New York Giants advanced to Championship Weekend behind a QB who hangs in the pocket as well as anyone, playmaking wide receivers, a defensive secondary that dominated the game long before their feared pass rush did (their defense is built similarly to the Chiefs), outlasting the referees, and taking advantage of a 15-1 (seriously, how did the Packers go 15-1?) team that peaked much too early in the season. (Side note - Brother Eli's success this postseason could provide even more drive/inspiration for Brother Peyton come next year, yet another reason I hope the Chiefs make a play for him.)

The song remains the same - How do you win in the NFL?

The most simplistic answer, and the one that makes my ears bleed, is to employ a great quarterback. However, this might be the most difficult of all strategies to successfully pull off. Elite quarterbacks are an endangered species. By most accounts, there are precisely five ON THE ENTIRE PLANET.

I know some people would like the process to be as simple as losing a bunch of games, getting a top draft pick, and then BAM...Eli Manning (yeah, I said it). It's not though. Even if it were, ask Dan Marino if that's the only necessary ingredient for a gourmet Bowl of Sup.

So some teams get there with great QB play, some teams get their by not making mistakes, some teams get their with an intimidating defense, some teams advance purely because of circumstances or a favorable matchup.

So what's the key then? How do you build a winner if you can't just turn over a rock and find a great QB? And how does that apply to our Chiefs? Well...

• Build around what you DO have (great defense, potential defensive mastermind, dynamic WR's, and hopefully a great RB in God Jam Charles).
• Take what you can get when you can get it (yes, Kyle Orton is eons better than Matt Cassel, a fact I feel so strongly about that I stood on top of a mountain and screamed it at the top of my lungs - IN DENVER, no less). 
• Keep your known valuable quantities (Dwayne Bowe and Brandon Carr are 2 of the 5 most important Chiefs on the roster right now - don't let money be an issue).
• Keep improving the team (beef up that defensive line, build some depth along the offensive line, snag a new tight end, add another RB to the mix).
• Take a chance on one of them danged endangered species (you never know when one might turn up, so keep your eyes open and have a contract ready. That means finding new homes for the domesticated pets - and bring your playbook with you, Tyler/Matt.)

We're not as far off as you fear, folks. The Kansas City Chiefs have a good team. We've seen it in bits and pieces. They can win, and I think they can win next year. There are no dominant teams in the NFL right now like we saw in New England and Indianapolis five years ago (and if there is, then we just manhandled them last month). So keep your heads up Chiefs Nation, ignore this phone tapping story that will be forgotten by the first big snowstorm, and enjoy the final three games of The Beautiful Game (that is, the NFL sans pass interference - notice how it wasn't called this weekend? Mmmm, poetry).

His Dirkness

Baseball Playoff Predictions

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Ay. I feel like making predictions for a sport I don't know a whole hell of a lot about. I always feel when I'm making my NCAA Tournament picks that some guy who knows nothing about College Basketball stands a better chance than me. This is my chance to be that guy.

Plus I'm motivated by what was the best 10 minutes of baseball I've watched since the 2004 ALCS (that was between the Yanks and the Sox). Here's what happened to my interest though: The Red Sox won the World Series, and immediately became as unlikeable as the Yankees. This left me with nobody to root for in this rivalry. And since half of ESPN's coverage is devoted to this overrated conflict (yea I said it), I have little choice but to ignore the sport that I've little interest in (probably because I never played it and the Royals have always sucked).

This is what will happen.

Tampa Bay over Texas in 6 4

The Devil Rays are hot. The Rangers did good last year I think. Seems obvious. Especially after seeing everybody on ESPN.com take the Rangers. Idiots.

Detroit over NY Yankees in 7 5

This Turdlander dude from the Tigers seems like the real deal. He wins Game 7 5 in New Yahk. The Yankees aren't even fun to hate anymore, they're just boring.

Milwaukee over Arizona in 5 4

Brewers seem rough. Prince Fielder (The Vegetarian Bomber) has a swagger to him. Ryan Braun wore a leather jacket on an episode of PTI, and passes the Sportscenter test (good highlights, game winning plays). I'm gonna go ahead and root for the Brew Crew in these playoffs. 

Philadelphia over St. Louis in 5 3

This is gonna piss my buddy Brockoli Jones off to no end, but the Phillies are getting to the World Series at the very least. Their pitchers are way better than everybody else's. 

*so apparently baseball begins the playoffs with 5 game serieseses

His dirkliness

New Show in Town ~ Sporting KC

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Whether you're on the Suck for Luck bandwagon or you ain't, one thing is clear for all Chiefs fans: The passion for this season is (*Denny Matthews voice*) GONE!

I just didn't know it had all transferred over to a different team in town. Who you ask?

Sporting Kansas City.

Last night I ventured over to Livestrong Park to take in my first Sporting game of the season. Simply put, it was the best sporting event I've attended in 2011 (take that Chiefs home opener!). I had previously attended a Wizards game at Arrowhead Stadium and was underwhelmed by everything but the opportunity to yell at Freddy Adu all game long. The difference was night and day.

Fast forward to today, and I'm still exhausted from jumping around like a fool and chanting along all game long. I was lucky enough to sit stand in "The Cauldron" where all the crazies sit stand (only 15 bucks). The coolest part about the game was (what appeared to be) elected fan leaders that faced the crowd and led them all in the team's chants (probably around 15) all game long. They made sure the crowd stayed rowdy through the entire 90 minutes, and they succeeded.

The next coolest part was cheaper beer for all the fans sitting in The Cauldron. While the peons paid 8.50 for piss in a cup, us fancy folk were paying 6 bucks for a big ass Drop Kick Ale (mmm delicious). Cheap beer also leads to great fan participation (are you noticing the pattern yet?).

I've always wanted to attend a European soccer game, or even on a grander scale, a World Cup game (on my sports Bucket List). I've always been infatuated by the atmosphere of those games, with what I call the most passionate fan bases in the world. Well, I gots me a taste of it last night. And it was good.

And Sporting KC is good. They clinched a spot in the playoffs last night, and currently sit in first place in the eastern conference after whooping up on the team that was in first place last week. A home playoff game is looking more and more likely, and would be an event that I wouldn't want to miss out on.

So while I remain a Chiefs fan first and foremost, my competitive fan juices might be saved up for Major League Soccer this year. And if you haven't made your way out to a game yet, I'd strongly advise you to do so sooner rather than later. Who knows if this city's passion for Sporting KC will run as strong when the Chiefs are trotting out Andrew Luck in 2012.

His Dirkness

Kansas City Chiefs vs. Baltimore Ravens Retro Diary

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A week past the Super Bowl felt like the proper time to conclude football season (as well as Dirkness sports articles for a temporary attempt at movies) by finally sitting down to re-watch the Chiefs-Ravens playoff clash. You see the game an entirely different way watching on TV than you do in attendance at the game. For starters, at the game, you're more focused on the end result of each play as opposed to what led to the result of a play. All you care about is being as loud as humanly possible and witnessing success. I feel like you're more in tune with the game because you're feeling many of the same emotions that the players are feeling (the atmosphere, the weather, momentum, etc.) At home, you're in constant reminder of what players are doing what, and more in tune of WHY stuff is happening. You're usually more aware of the tiny nuances that make the game so beautiful (in game adjustments, breaking tendencies, injuries, replays, etc.). I've made a point to re-watch every Chiefs game I attended throughout the year so that I was able to get the best of both worlds. Time was both available and needed after, what turned out to be, the last game of a GREAT Kansas City Chiefs season.

I've decided I'm gonna attack this article in a Sports Guy retro diary kind of way, sharing thoughts with you as the game goes on in chronological order.

12:00 - I LOVE the CBS pregame hype-up videos. I feel instantaneously fired up about this game, almost like we've been given a second chance.

12:03 - Jim Nantz: "It snowed overnight here, but now it's just cold."

12:05 - Eric Berry almost picks off the pass on the very first play of the game, which I half remember. Now realizing that I'm gonna cringe at every missed opportunity that could've altered the outcome of this game.

12:08 - Flowers follows that with another near INT

12:10 - "Houshmandzadeh has been involved in some jawing on the last two plays." This is the point where I tried to decipher which race he was so I could hurl vulgar slurs his way. I settled on "vagina."

12:12 - Fumbled Flacco snap on 1st and goal at the 1 yard line. Missed opportunity number 3 of the first drive.

12:13 - Ray Rice is a bitch.

12:15 - Berry finishes his up-and-down drive with a terrific breakup of a pass. Heap beat him for multiple 3rd down conversions on the drive. It seemed like Berry was involved on every single play of that drive, which I think is a good thing. I can't remember the last Chiefs goalline stand from the 1 yard line, and if I didn't know the end result of this game, I'd say that was huge. 3-0 Ravens.

12:18 - The blimp view displays a "Go Chiefs" between two arrowheads and HyVee logos in the stands. How did this happen? Was it superimposed? Was everybody holding up cards of some sort? SOMEBODY ANSWER ME!

12:20 - Beautiful deep fade throw to Moeaki on the second play for the Chiefs offense and he lands just out of bounds. The bipartisan part of me is thinking none of the breaks are going our way.

12:21 - God Jam gets rocked on his first carry and pops up emphatically with a nice Wilhelm scream. Mutual respect begins to radiate out of Ray Lewis' body. Chiefs punt.

12:27 - 3rd and 11 swing pass to Ray Rice picks up a first down. I had heard endless criticism of Jon McGraw from this game. There's the first piece of evidence.

12:28 - Haley challenges after the Ravens get the first down by a few inches (great balancing effort by The Pocket Butthole, Ray Rice). Don't like challenging calls in the first quarter unless it's a huge play or obvious. I think what he really wanted to challenge was his decision to keep McGraw on the roster.

12:36 - First goosebumps of the game watching Tamba crawl around on the ground after strip-sacking Flacco. The Chiefs get their first break of the game with Joe's non-recovery skills.

12:37 - First play after the turnover is a flea flicker, another play I didn't remember. Love the call. Kevin Curtis was open. Wait, who?

12:37 1/2 - Before the snap, I scream at the top of my lungs, "RUN JAMAAL CHARLES!"

12:38 - GOD JAM CHARLES! His head-bobbing run was oddly reminiscent of Priest Holmes record breaking touchdown run (edit: the run I'm referring to a Priest run that came against the Miami Dolphins in a weird Friday night game, where he bobs his head just like JamaAL did for like 30 yards). At this point, I can't believe we could lose. 7-3 CHIEFS!

Game Pause: In search of this Holmes run I was referring to I stumbled across this video, which must immediately be seen by anybody who has ever cheered on the Chiefs. Roll it....



First off, the Priest arms out move is so fuckin' awesome that words cannot even describe it. Second, check out the Trent Green block on the run starting at the 3:08 mark. Third, pay attention to the score in the Minnesota game: Down 31-0 but score 3 TD's in about 5 minutes to cut it to 31-20. Lastly, Priest's record-setting run (the one I had gotten it confused with) came against the Bears and was so unbelievably brilliant that it transcended football (and life, for that matter) and exceeds anything I, or my children, or my children's children could ever accomplish.

12:41 - Nantz brings up God Jam's run against the Chargers from the season opener which confirms my sentiment that this game seems remarkably similar to. Opponent races out to an early lead, looks like it might pull away with it, until a long Charles run swings the tide.

12:44 - Really like how Eric Berry positions tape at both joints on his fingers. That IS badass.

End of 1st quarter - Can't believe how good the Chiefs look outside of 3rd down defense. The Ravens are completely unable to run the ball, but seem to find success on every short crossing route. Defense has been on the field for too much of the first quarter, confirmed by the Ravens 27-5 advantage in offensive plays.

12:47 - Eric Berry just made an unfathomably amazing play where he came from a deep safety position all the way across the field to break up a 5 yard drag route in the flat. My god Berry, my god.

12:48 - Ravens punt from the Chiefs' 40 yard line on 4th and 5. I break the World Record for most times yelling "vaginas" in public in a 60 second time span. Nate tallied 44, while Rob said 47.

12:51 - JamaAL Charles for 11 yards. JamaAL Charles for 8. JamaAL Charles for 7. Just sayin'.

12:53 - JamaAL fumble. I need a drink. Let it be known that the Chiefs were dominating up to this point.

12:57 - Interesting to note that his fumble wasn't the tide-turner that I thought it was. Following a Ravens' 3-and-out and bad punt, the Chiefs still stand in good shape. I sense doom though.

12:59 - Hold up! The "bad Ravens punt" was marked out of bounds at the 18 yard line by the side judge. Coming back from commercial the ball is sitting at the 13. This is bullshit! There was no penalty to speak of, and ESPN's play by play shows the punt going to the 13. But I just re-watched and double-checked it 5 times. I'm now debating writing a letter to the NFL asking them to reconsider the outcome of this game. I think it should be replayed from the moment of this punt, 9:12 left in the 2nd quarter.

Now, everybody's first reaction to this is gonna be, "Did it cost them the game?" Which nobody could reasonably argue, but this is a big business league. This is an NFL playoff game. I'm just a fan, but people's livelihoods are at stake on games like this. And no, that's not an exaggeration. I just don't understand how this could happen, and makes me question how often this happens.

1:00 - First play of the drive is a beautiful fake screen to McCluster quick slant to Moeaki over the middle. This is a play design with a very high chance to succeed.

1:01 - Next play is Jam Charles for 11, finishing the run by lowering his shoulder into Ravens CB Josh Wilson. "Charles shaken up right here Phil" may have been the biggest turning point in the game.

1:07 - McCluster gets absolutely trucked by Ed Reed to end the drive. These are the drives I was most curious about in re-watching this game, when the Chiefs had the ball and the lead. I think there was only two of them, and both were squandered by mistakes (Charles fumble, Albert false start on 3rd and 3).

1:08 - Ricky Price fucks up downing the punt inside the 5 yard line leads to me throwing a pillow in frustration. Maybe this wasn't such a good idea.

1:14 - Joe Flacco to Todd Heap on 3rd and 13 (McGraw on the coverage) is the biggest play of the game to this point. Ensures the Ravens with the last drive of the half, ultimately leading to the pull ahead score.

1:17 - Pretty good little cheap shot on Flacco from Jovan Belcher right there. Goes uncalled. Neither Berry nor McGraw can stop Heap (season highs in catches and yards before half).

1:20 - Apparent miscommunication between DJ and McGraw leads to Rice touchdown. DJ doesn't run with him, and looks around after he scores like he thought somebody should've been there. McGraw jumped a slant over the middle from the opposite side, which was already well covered by Berry. McGraw went with his instincts. Good eye manipulation by Prop Joe. Ravens 10-7.

HALFTIME - It's frustrating because I really feel like the Chiefs were the superior team in the first half. KC owned the line of scrimmage, finding plenty of room to run the ball, while the Ravens could hardly muster anything on the ground, hanging around with long 3rd down conversions thrown to Todd Heap. Cassel only attempted 5 passes in the 1st half, none of which in D-Bowe's direction obviously. Without knowledge of the end result, I would feel confident in the Chiefs coming back in the 2nd half.

1:38 - I had no idea Matt Cassel played in the Little League World Series, but I love that his nickname was "Moose."

1:39 - Chiefs come out pass, pass, pass on the first drive. The second pass was a fake screen to McCluster, screen to McCluster, truly one of the worst play designs I've seen of the Chiefs season. The third pass was intercepted, at which point Ed Reed immediately begins clapping his hands wanting the pitch, which the Japanese Ravens finally does, only to get it stripped away. Who forced the fumble AND recovered it? That would be Jamaal Charles.

1:40 - Oh yea, what an incredibly stupid play by Reed. I can't consider him one of the all-time greats after witnessing something that idiotic.

1:44 - I think it went largely unnoticed that Barry Richardson played a great game, atleast so far.

1:45 - Thomas Jones did a bad job of picking his hole on the 3rd and 1 prior to the biggest play of the game. If he plows behind Asamoah and Shaun Smith he easily gets the first down.

1:46 - Oy. The 4th and 1 toss to Charles was unbelievably bad. I watched the play over and over and I think the blame goes on Leonard Pope, who was slow to get out of his stance, and then stumbled into his block, giving the Ravens' Jarret Johnson the corner, forcing Charles to cut it back. It's funny how you never know which player can be involved in the biggest play of your season, and sometimes it's someone like Leonard Pope not executing, and that's all it takes. You never know.

1:49 - Wow, I can't believe they just called that Roughing the Passer on Tamba Hali. I guess that makes up for the non-call on Belcher. I guess...

1:50 - Eric Berry just caught a pass that happened to be in 'Quan Boldin's chest.

1:51 - Ray Rice is a bitch.

1:52 - Obvious holding call on Oher vs. Dorsey goes uncalled.

1:54 - I feel like the Chiefs have missed so many opportunities in this game that I want another shot to cheer them on harder. I can do better! Ravens 13-7.

1:58 - Intentional grounding call was absolute bullshit. D-Bowe ran an out, was covered, and cut up field, at which point Moose Cassel threw it, only D-Bowe stopped on it, giving the appearance of intentional grounding. I'm now booing at my TV.

2:01 - Don't ask me my thoughts on Dexter McCluster until next season unless you want to see a grown man bitch and moan like an 8 year old girl.

2:02 - Awful illegal contact penalty on Eric Berry. This quarter is being officiated atrociously bad, one of the worst I've ever seen.

2:06 - It's tough to say the defense didn't do their job in this game after stuffing the Ravens on yet another red zone trip. 16-7 Ravens.

2:09 - Leonard Pope manhandled by Suggs on a running play that looked promising. Cut him, cut him now.

2:10 - Cassel interception. It's fair to say he's entering "shitting his pants" territory.

2:11 - After the announcers talked about how the Ravens were going to attack Brandon Carr all game long, I don't think they've thrown at him a single time.

2:12 - At this point, the Chiefs defense is playing 10-on-11 with Mike Vrabel on the field.

2:13 - I think I'm becoming a Tyson Jackson fan.

2:16 - At this point the Chiefs felt the same way that I did up in the stands. Fight!

2:18 - Flowers chews out Vrabel after touchdown throw to 'Quan. Changing of the guard on the defense? Ravens 23-7.

End of 3rd quarter - This 3rd quarter fits every necessary criterion to be classified as a complete and utter meltdown (and I wrote that before the Cassel tuck rule call).

2:20-2:35 - (Pouting...)

2:36 - Awesome back-to-back play sequence where Oher drives Belcher's face back well after the whistle followed by Belcher kicking him in the face to get off of him. Next play Belcher punks Oher in the face after the play, faux-knocking him to the ground. Somebody should tell him that Sandra Bullock sucks as a person.

2:39 - Of all the bad plays in the game, I think the Demorrio Williams offsides on the Ravens punt may have been the most depressing.

2:44 - Awesome. Things got so chippy, with scuffles after each play, that the refs went to both head coaches and told them, "Stop it!"

2:48 - McGahee scores a TD and then this happens....



2:54 - Ray Lewis is pacing the sideline like he just murdered somebody and got away with it.

Final: Baltimore Ravens 30, Kansas City Chiefs 7 - Just remember Chiefs fans, something like 7 straight postseason losses can build character (yes, in you as a fan), and it will make that streak-breaking victory all the sweeter. Trust me, fans of teams that win all the time don't cherish it, and would long for the emotions that will overtake us when it happens.

Goodnight everybody,
His Dirkness

Lakers vs. Celtics Game 3

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I feel there is no direct angle to go with after the Lakers' Game 3 victory (and don't want to create one on my own to thrust out an "intriguing" article), other than it was poorly played (Lakers bad, Celtics worse), poorly officiated (might want to review this), and poorly affected the Celtics' chance at winning the series. This was a contest that went from the Lakers inability to put the game away when they had the opportunity, to the Lakers allowing the Celtics to crawl back into it with incredibly bad shot selection and arrogance of The Icon Impersonator, to the Celtics relying on ice-cold (the bad variety) Ray Allen down the stretch, to a near complete and utter embarrassment for the league and the sport of basketball if the Celtics would've unjustifiably come back in the last two minutes.

The Celtics lost home-court advantage (suddenly more important in Hockey) on a night that saw their most underperforming player (KG) score the first six points of the game to the delight of a raucous crowd. However, it quickly became evident that the Celtics couldn't put together anything resembling an offense without Garnett in the post or Rondo in transition. I cannot comprehend why Doc Rivers played Crazy Eyes Baby down the stretch as opposed to Cheesy 'Sheed or Krazy Kendrick (how many loose screws amongst those three? And that doesn't even include Ron-Con Artest). He (back to Big Baby) provided nothing on the offensive end, was too slow to guard L'Odom, and too small to guard Kung Pau. Much the same, Doc was too slow to reinsert players from the bench, and too small minded to keep riding Garnett down the stretch instead of a shooter that couldn't hit a jail yard from a basketball arena (think Jesus). The ironic part of the series is how Ray Allen has now won the Celtics a game, and lost them a game, which I suppose makes him the most important player in the series up this point.

I feel I must address the Celtics semi-possible "comeback" at the end of the game, sponsored by the refs, that included three reviews on out of bounds calls (first I've heard of this rule), and which led to every player complaining after every shot and the announcers scrambling for ways to stay hush-hush (Beard n' Stache wouldn't have masqueraded this) about the NBAtrocity that the officiating has become. Lets face it, the Celtics and Lakers got to the Finals based on how they've played, but also by how well each veteran-laden team is able to work the refs during games (led by Derek Bitcher). How can this continue to be such a problem for a professional sport? You might respond with the argument of how hard it is to govern the game of basketball, to which I reply College Basketball does just fine with it. Blame falls equally on the refs (phantom call on Pierce's And-1 to keep things interesting) and players (Kung Pau flopping around like a bearded seal) in present terms, but collectively on David Stern ("The best Commissioner in sports"), who deserves his own sentence. The review implementation didn't seem like a bad idea up until they're reviewing a play containing a foul that can't be called, leaving the refs no choice but to switch the call and reward the fouling team with the ball. This is a case of the letter of the law overriding the intent of the law, a situation that should remain absent from professional sports, yet present in Stern's nightmares. Nobody will be upset about this because it hasn't gravely affected the outcome of a game. Yet.

The worst part of the game was that the Celtics had the Lakers right where they wanted them. Kobe started to panic and was returning to his former Pop-A-Shot self (He drew backboard before iron unintentionally on atleast three fourth quarter shots). Kung Pau wasn't touching the ball nearly enough and was cowering into his KG-induced imaginative shell, ala the 2008 NBA Finals. It will be hard to overcome a home loss and find a way to grind out another victory in Los Angeles. Since 1985, when the NBA introduced the 2-3-2 Finals format, the team winning Game 3 in a series tied 1-1 has gone on to win the series every time (I got that stat from Linda Cohn's Facebook!!!). My prediction may come to fruition, to the dismay of many, especially those that sat through Derek Fisher's post-game waterworks.

I would like to encourage further Laker-bashing on the comments of this post. Come with all nicknames, anecdotes, and rants. Bring your creativity, immaturities, passion, emotional backlash, and irrationalities to the party. All is welcome no matter how short, unfunny, or illogical it may be. Trust me, it'll make you feel better and probably enjoy the rest of the Finals even more.

Di Shirkness

2010 NFL Divisional Round Playoff Predictions

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I was planning on making predictions for every playoff game this year through the Dirkness, but couldn't find time before the annual ski trip commenced, and couldn't find a computer (or enough brain cells) while on the trip. Let's just say I dominated them though, and anyone who says I went 0-4 can answer to my fadeaway. And no, I will not be answering any questions regarding Dirk's conquest of ruining his legacy by cutting his hair. Warum?!?!?!?!



On to the picks...

Arizona-New Orleans: The Saints are the most vulnerable of all the teams with the bye week. Atleast the Colts porous ending was self-induced, the Saints just plain fell apart. The Cardinals are clearly the weirdest team in the NFL, they fully depend on what side of the bed Kurt Warner rolls off on. These two teams seem the exact same to me, so where's the advantage? The Saints are playing at home? eh. This same Cardinals team went to the Super Bowl last year? Closer. Drew Brees hasn't really proved it in the playoffs and Kurt Warner has? There it is. Oh yea, and don't eff with Kurt Warner in the playoffs!

Arizona 31, New Orleans 27



Baltimore-Indianapolis: The Colts have seemed destined for a stellar regular season followed by a disappointing postseason since about Week 3. The Ravens are led by Avon Lewis and Stringer Reed (praise The Wire). Oh, and they beat up the falsely feared faux-Faderiots (T-minus 389 days until Belichick heads to Kansas City). They got on them early though, and Joe Flacco was never asked to make a play. The Ravens will want to pound away again this week, and will win if they can, but Flacco will definitely have to make some throws. I don't think he can handle the heat from Marlo Freeney and the rest of the new boys in town. Remember, the Colts own the Ravens. They have beaten them 7 times in a row with much of the same personnel on both sides. The only thing that changes is that this is the playoffs, that's never been a problem for Peyton and the Colts has it? Not that I can remember...

Indianapolis 23, Baltimore 13



Dallas-Minnesota: The Cowboyz are purely the hottest team in the league right now. The Vikings are purely the best team in the league right now. The winner of the Super Bowl comes from this game. How do they match-up? Favre's best is better than Romo's best, but Favre's worst is worse than Romo's worst. Read that again. So, I would say heavily dependent on Favre. The Boys have the second best defense left in the league (Jets), but I think they're more suited to shut down wide-open passing attacks, akin to the Eagles and Saints. Can they shut down Adrian Peterson? Will AD's hush-hush case of 'Adrian has the fumbles' rear its head (6 this year)? The Cowboys won't be able to run the ball, but should find some room through the air, and if they can set up the run through that, will be able to win the game. For the Cowboys-I love Tony Romo, Felix Jones, DeMarcus Ware (the most underrated player in the league), and for the fact that we get to see Keith Brooking's pregame pump-up speech. For the Vikings-I love Jared Allen, Chester Taylor, Sidney Rice, and the aesthetics of Visanthe Shiancoe. For the game-I love the unders and that it's the toughest game to choose. I'm going against my Super Bowl pick of about Week 10, and I'm going all in with Tony Romo.

Cowboys 17, Vikings 13



NY Jets-San Diego: The Jets have the best defense and, perhaps, the best coach left in the playoffs. (There is a severe lack of top coaches left in the postseason, and for that matter the whole league. I think you only have 3 elite coaches left with Andy Reid being a rung below Billy Goat Belichick and Jeff Fisher. Who else?) The Chargers have the best mix of consistency and hotness coming into the playoffs, which makes them dangerous. They have been hearing about Darelle Revis all week (deservedly so - screwed out of Defensive Player of the Year), but will surely have a plan to counter him. I expect the Jets to roll the safeties to the other corner's side, which will result in Vincent Jackson getting opportunities for one-on-one jump balls against Revis. I see him winning a couple of them. The Chargers offense thrives off the deep ball more than any other. The problem with the Jets is if they get behind in this game at all, they are done. This is the week you see great teams with bad quarterback play go out.

San Diego 24, NY Jets 13

2010 NFL Week 17 Running Diary

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I thought I'd steal a page from The Sports Guy and keep a running diary of thoughts while enjoying a full slate of the final week's worth of games in the NFL:

Games on: Noon~Steelers-Dolphins, Vikings-Giants, 3PM~Chiefs-Broncos

~Wes Welker gives support to the strategy of resting starters by going down with what has to be a season-ending knee injury. This is huge. He has been a bigger factor than Randall Gene Moss this year-his actual middle name.

~A Tyler Thigpen sighting on the Dolphins sidelines- almost forgot he still existed.

~I like Chad Henne a lot in his first year of starting. He reminds me of an old Carson Palmer pre-knee injury. Even more proof that Bill Parcells knows what he's doing on draft day. I expect the Dolphins to be in the playoffs next year.

~Anyone who thinks safety isn't an important position in the NFL needs to watch the season in review tape of the Pittsburgh Steelers this year and pay attention to them with and without Troy Polamalu. Helloooooo Eric Berry!

~Why aren't networks quicker to switch games when they aren't close and there are no regional ties? Can't they just put a person in charge of choosing which games are being shown? Can I apply for this job? I put the blame for this not existing squarely on Roger Goodell.

~Visanthe Shiancoe is unfairly anatomically gifted. This guy knows what I'm talking about...

~Brett Favre is definitely a rhythm passer and seems to have found it today. If he stays in that rhythm, nobody will beat the Vikings.

~The Rams starting quarterback is some guy named Keith Null. How could they be 1-14?

~I would check out the Miami Dolphins offensive coordinator, Dan Henning. They are one of the most exciting and creative offenses in the league without top talent.

~At first I just saw Tyler Thigpen on the sideline. He is now in the game and has led two touchdown drives in about 3 minutes. This is bittersweet to watch because I like Thiggy, but well obviously...Somewhere Chan Gailey is smiling.

~Thigpen makes a terrible decision in the Red Zone and throws a pick. Seems very familiar. I sure do miss the excitement he brings to Sundays though.

~Thankfully Jacksonville lost to the Browns ending any shot at a playoff berth. They would've been blown out by whoever they played and I'm glad I don't have to sit through it.

~I'm basing my NFC Super Bowl pick on who gets the 2nd seed. If Philly beats Dallas tonight then I'm going with Philly. If they lose, I'm going with Minnesota.

~First play of Chiefs game defies all conventional wisdom. Terrence Copper catches a pass. Champ Bailey gets burnt. Matt Cassel throws successful deep pass. And the Chiefs have their first offensive touchdown of the first quarter ALL YEAR!!!

~A day of firsts- The first sack of the season for Glenn Dorsey!!!

~One of my favorite things to see in football is the punt returner who is nowhere near breaking a good return gets up and acts like he was oh so close to breaking it. Lets call it the Dante Hall post goodness syndrome.

~Two good plays by Brandon Carr already, crashing the block and tripping Knowshown on a 3rd and 1 run, and a 3rd down pass breakup.

~The Chiefs are driving down the field with a chance to go up two scores and Haley calls for a trick play pass to Matt Cassel?!?!?! I officially have zero confidence left in Todd Haley. He is a joke of a coach. What a loser. Could've challenged the catch too.

~The Pass Interference rules need to be adjusted. It's the most inconsistently called penalty in the game, and you can't have minor touches resulting in 40 yard gains. There needs to be a major and a minor infraction. Major-spot foul. Minor-10 yard penalty. Boom Boom Pow. Terrible call on my man B. Carr.

~Denver's in-com-plete chant is the lamest cheer in all of sports. It is the only play of no consequences. Nothing happens. It's a reset. It would be like having a cheer for a missed shot in basketball. Or a cheer for a foul ball in baseball.

~I don't care if it worked this time, add lining up in shotgun on 3rd and 1 to the list of continuously stupid moves made by Haley.

~Jamaal Charles is a stud. He has figured out how to read blocks and use his electric speed. Throw in just a decent bigger back (easy to find) to back him up and we are set at running back.

~How many times are we going to see Bobby Wade and Todd Haley almost come to blows on the sideline this year?

~These refs are doing an atrocious job. Pick up the pass interference flag on Denver for "not enough contact" and then throw another terrible one on Brandon Flowers on a 3rd and 20.

~Haley not prepared to go for 2 to try for a 14 point lead with 9 minutes left. Mistake.

~Derrick Johnson--where have you been all my life?

~Tamba Hali owns Broncos offensive tackle Ryan Clady. He has 4 sacks on him this year and has been in the backfield all day today. That's a bright spot for the future. I predicted 10 sacks on the year for Hali, he finished with 8.5, but the point was made.

~Nobody, and i mean NOBODY, blows the last game of the season...like the Denver Broncos! 49ers, Chargers, Chiefs.

~The curse is broken...Chiefs snap an 8 game losing streak at the fake Mile High!

I'm out,
His Dirkness