Wednesday, September 5, 2012


Click here to make fun of my last year's NFL Predictions!


AFC East:
1. New England Patriots 13-3 (1 seed)
2. Buffalo Bills 9-7 (6 seed)
3. New York Jets 7-9
4. Miami Dolphins 5-11

Take: The Patriots have a seriously easy schedule this year, along with the rest of the AFC East (playing the AFC South and NFC West, the two worst divisions in the NFL). So there is a great chance the Pats repeat as the top record in the AFC. Don't be surprised to see the other teams in this division overachieve with that easy of a schedule.

AFC South:
1. Houston Texans 11-5 (2 seed)
2. Indianapolis Colts 8-8
3. Tennessee Titans 5-11
4. Jacksonville Jaguars 4-12

Take: Possibly the worst bottom three teams of a division I've ever seen in the NFL. The Texans could start Cade McNown on their way to the AFC South title this year. As for the other three doormats, I'll say the Colts stand the best chance to emerge.

AFC North:
1. Pittsburgh Steelers 10-6 (3 seed)
2. Cincinnati Bengals 8-8
3. Baltimore Ravens 7-9
4. Cleveland Browns 4-12

Take: This division has me stumped. Both the Ravens and Squealers are candidates to plunge this season, but I don't quite buy the Bengals either (overachieved with a super easy schedule last season). The one thing I am sure of is the Browns finishing 4th.

AFC West:
1. Denver Broncos 10-6 (4 seed)
2. Kansas City Chiefs 9-7 (5 seed)
3. Oakland Raiders 7-9
4. San Diego Super Chargers 7-9

Take: I think Peyton will be half the QB we're accustomed to seeing, but pulls out just enough late game wins to take the division before he keels over for good. A game-by-game breakdown of the Chiefs' 9-7 season is heading your way later this week.


NFC East:
1. Philadelphia Eagles 11-5 (3 seed)
2. New York Giants 9-7
3. Dallas Cowboys 8-8
4. Washington Redskins 5-11

Take: The Eagles put way too much pressure on themselves last season and predictably crapped the bed in the opening stanza. Since everybody assumes Vick gets hurt this year, he will probably start all 16 games. I like the Cowboys but over-predict on them every season. The Giants field the same record as last year but miss the playoffs in this edition.

NFC South:
1. Atlanta Falcons 12-4 (2 seed)
2. Tampa Bay Buccaneers 10-6 (6 seed)
3. New Orleans Saints 7-9
4. Carolina Panthas 7-9

Take: High on the Falcons. Julio Jones' emergence has been well documented, but Jacquizz Rodgers' hasn't yet (he runs for 1,200 yards this season). Asante Samuel provides championship experience, and new defensive coordinator Mike Nolan brings the ruckus to the defense. PLUS, it's Tony Gonzalez's last season in the NFL, giving them that extra little bit of motivation that I like (that's a lot of words on the Falcons..). Turmoil will flood the Saints, the Panthas aren't ready yet, but the Buccaneers are my surprise team of the NFL with plenty of young talent and a bounce back year from Jaaaaash Freeman (who I've come to like somehow).

NFC North:
1. Chicago Bears 12-4 (1 seed)
2. Green Bay Packers 11-5 (5 seed)
3. Detroit Lions 9-7
4. Minnesota Vikings 5-11

Take: My prediction that nobody else has, the Bears overtake the Packers and win the NFC North. Everything came so easy for GB last year, I think they're due for some turbulence. Meanwhile, emo-BFF's Jay Cutler and Brandon Marshall are reunited (for what should be 120 receptions) in a city with wind.

NFC West:
1. Seattle Seahawks 9-7 (4 seed)
2. San Francisco 49ers 8-8
3. St. Louis Rams 6-10
4. Arizona Cardinals 3-13

Take: The 49ers fall back to earth, bringing the rest of the division with them. I wish I could pick nobody to win this division (just like I wish I could pick nobody to win the AFC). Alas, I'll ride the Russell Wilson III bandwagon even further as he choo-choo's Harbaugh's egg nog-a-nog.

Playoffs?!?! Playoffs.

Wildcard Round:
AFC - Kansas City over Denver, Pittsburgh over Buffalo
NFC - Philadelphia over Tampa Bay, Green Bay over Seattle

Divisional Round:
AFC - Houston over Pittsburgh, New England over Kansas City
NFC - Green Bay over Chicago, Atlanta over Philadelphia

Championship Round:
AFC - Houston over New England
NFC - Atlanta over Green Bay

Soup(er) Bowl:
Atlanta over Houston


DBZ said...

Obviously you didn't want to share this with me before our fantasy draft, but I wish you would have told me about Jacquizz Rodgers in time for my other league's draft. Also I agree with Marshall. I wish I would have gotten Marshall in one of my leagues. I mean he wasn't exactly a sleeper, but he is going to tear it up.

As far as the picks go, so you think Matt Ryan can get the job done? I guess Alex Smith almost did last year. Speaking of which, I don't see them going down that much. They actually made some moves to pick up receivers and the defense should still be stellar. I like the Tampa and Philly picks, but I don't think Indy will bounce back that much. Probably good to admit the Cowboys will underachive.

Also I added up your wins and losses to make sure they matched. Do you actually pick every game then see what you come up with or just estimate for each team?

His Dirkness said...

Haaaaaaa, Zeetzy.

I come from a family of mathematicians so OF COURSE I added up all the wins and losses. No, I don't pick every game. After I finished my initial picks, I was 8 wins short, so I added them here and there.

The Colts at 8-8 seems to be my most scrutinized pick. I think Luck is NFL ready and the rest of that division sucks. They'll be the Bengals of this year.

I think the WR's picked up will have little impact on the 49ers, and might actually be a net negative. I think they might lose their identity trying to get them involved. Everybody thinks I am down on the 49ers, you should read Bill Barnwell on Grantland, he writes about it like twice a week. I just don't think they were as good as their record last year, and I think Harbaugh is overrated at this point. Nobody agrees with me. I'm cool with that.


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